Mother nature: the worst terrorist of all

Fearing the worst from a sore throat, Lord Bluetint quarantined himself in his study. The following is what he told me across the telephone after I asked for his opinions on the environment.

Mother Nature, now, she’s the worst terrorist of all, and by that I don’t mean she’s clumsy and inept, or what have you, quite the opposite. I mean she stalks us all, randomly taking billions of us out each year through illness, pestilence and natural disaster. Cheery thought, I know, but there is no escaping the fact that she is a remorseless killer, the perfect killer. A person needs to be on guard when dealing with her.

Chicken Flu is a prime example of her powers. Great I thought, I’m not a chicken. Therefore I should be in the clear, but Mother Nature is not big on semantics. You can try and be pedantic all you want and point out the obvious, but once she has you that’s it, there can be no arguments.

The men in white coats, the boffins, the other week they told she is getting worse, out of control, almost. However, the relationship with Mother Nature during human existence has always been a loving one. We try taming her because we love taking advantage. That is how it is and has always been. Like what’s-his-face, the film fellow with the eyes, Indiana Milliband, that’s him, forever sticking his arm out to retrieve his hat at the last second. Nice legs he has as well. Good solid legs for walking, which is important in his line of work, but forgive me, I digress.

Where were we? Yes. What I’m trying to say is that when it comes to Mother Nature, us humans are just like Indiana Milliband in the Temple of Dim, in that our greedy faces light up at the thought of all the riches and jewels we can scoop up in our hands and have away. I reckon she’s about damn near had enough, don’t you?